am i right to say that meaning? bud why is it i dun feel dat way now? is it becos moii frens don mean wad they say? or is it, they cant b wid me when i realli need them. arhs! i dunno. i am feeling so confused.
wad are frens for?
abandon me when i realli need them.
do they actually understand my feelings?
put urself in moii shoes.
how wld u actually when no one accompanied u?
finally i realise,
onli moii cousin wld b there for me and helped me.
FORGET IT!
gen, wad u said actually hurts me.
i know u are straight forward.
i know wad u meant.
bud i just pretended not to listen.
i kept quiet.
in silence.
me, sim, jiaen, vanessa and gen wad actually chatting on the phone. den down came to sim, gen and me. and it turn out to b like dis. seriously when gen was talking abt that, i felt so much like hanging up the phone. bud i noe i am the main one who controlled the conference call so i cant. becos i felt realli pek chek. bud i controlled my temper.
i know u gurls felt extra becos its moii bf's bday party. and it sounds like i am forcing u gurls to go. if u felt that way i am sry cos i didnt mean to. i just wanted someone to accompany me cos i dun wan to b alone. his frens are coming. so somehow i wld b left alone. arghs! i jus dunnoe how to put it in. somemore, his family will b there too. it will b moii first tyme seeing them. i feel so nervous and scared. there isnt anyone i noe. i understand wad u gurls meant.like wad u gurls said, as his gf, i haf to attend. bud i dun ve to push u gurls to come along wid me also. u gurls are not related to him. so wad for u gurls haf to go right? neither do i noe them too except him. saying that i am ma fan. blaming me for doing dis. why cant u gurls understand?
i felt so disappointed. utterly disappointed.
when i need u gurls, u gurls cant make it. bud when u gurls need me. i will always try moii best to b there. is it fair to me? i guess i am sounding too emotional. haish! i dun wanna think more abt it. its no point feeling stress regarding this situation. at least i ve moi cousin wid me. i am not alone in the end. realli wanna thank her! =)).
like wad moii mom told me. dun b sad or rather stress abt it. they ps u its okay. next time, if they ask u anything. do the same thing to them and they will noe how u actually feel when they do that to u. if there is anything just tell her and not keep it to heart.
hai shi mama zui hao ba? 24 hrs xiao mama! seriously i wanna thank god for hafing such a perfect mother who is always being there for me.
come to think of it. i doubt i will do the same thing to them if they realli ask me to barhs. as u all noe moii heart is soft. i dun wanna hurt them too. i dun wanna b bad. so yups!
anw, tml is surppose to b a happy occasion. so lets not b sad abt it barhs. haish! why does it turned out like dis ?
hafing a terrible headache & moii head injury pain is coming back again. must relax abit le.
surppose to ve an agreement to go and now ppl backing out. which i hate most.
gonna watch 3am match todae till 5 plus. i guess i going to zombie when i see him. lolls. i will just try to b as happy as i can. dun wanna make him worry also and i intend to keep dis situation frm him.
BRAZIL VS FRANCE! surpporting brazil!
hmms! dunno wad happen this morning. moii upper lip was actually swollen. and now it is still it is. feeling a lump dere. the feeling is so werid. yikes! hopefully it will b healed tml. so scary. lip swollen. lols
now,
i hope moii wound will heal fast
so dat everything is gonna b alrite tml
so dat i wld not feel moody tml
&
just b a happy gal whom i used to b
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