` it hUrts .

i rather myself to suffer all these than seeing my mom going through .
it came through my mind everyday .
i wld not feel at ease till the operation ended. i know im worrying too much but i cant help it .
really .
i can't help it .
i tried to be strong but im sOrry .
i am just a weak person .

it will be a day operation .
if doc found any cancerous cells , it wld be a full day .
date of operation has yet to be confirmed.

the operation somehow just reminded me of my 2nd aunt .
the pain she went through .
i will never forget .
she has left this world but i still miss her that much .

seeing my mom feeling worried makes me worry too .
though she may not have said out but i know she feels it deep inside her heart .
my heart just sank .
and i know , these few days , she has been trying to keep herself busy to refrain her from thinking .
as a daughter of hers , i will try my best to be with her whenever i can .

god ,

i pray to you .

please dont let anything happen to my mom .

bless her with good health .

i rather be the one to be hurt ,

than seeing her suffer .

it pains me more .

i just wanna let it out for the moment ,
becos i felt so tight up in my heart .
tears flew down as i typed this entry .
i'll try to be strong whenever i can .

((:

" Everything is gonna be alright ,

isn't it ? "