While browsing, came across photos of me & you. And all I can feel was heartbreak.
THIS WAS OUR FIRST POLAROID TOGETHER & IT WAS DURING V.DAY
Do you still remember? 5 years ago? When we first dated, we collected each other passport photo to place it in our wallet?
OUR FIRST VISIT TO HORT PARK
I still remembered after taking polaroid with Jaslin & Nicholas at HortPark. You complained to me immediately asking, "Why didn't you take photo with me?" Heh! That puts a smile on my face actually. How could I possibly miss you out?
OUR SHORT VACATION TO BATAM
My first overseas treat for you to celebrate your ORD and our belated anniversary. Though it was only a night spent in Batam, but I had a great time with you. A fun, romantic and relaxing trip. To me, anywhere is fine, as long as I'm with you.
TAKEN AT CHRIST METHODIST CHURCH DINNER EVENT, INVITED BY MERV
Kind us, paid $5 for a polaroid film, donated to charity. (:
WE SPENT & CELEBRATED OUR FIRST MID-AUTUM FESTIVAL TOGETHER
Throughout our 5 years relationship, for the first time, we celebrated mid-autumn festival on the actual day. Thank you for celebrating with me together with my girlfriends, including Merv, Aikho and Jas.
Unfortunately, those photos shown above were all memories for now. I can no longer carry on. The promises you made, the things you told me were words that I can no longer foresee. You said, you are working hard to earn a living for us, for our future. But do you know what I'm afraid of? Someone who promised to take care of me well in future, providing a comfortable place and happiness for us, yet unable to fulfill the promises he made to me after we made our vows and live together. Question to me is, "What happens if I've been waiting all these while, yet it did not happen? Ain't I waiting in vain? "
All these while, I've been looking after on my own, which you've groomed me to be very independent ; Taking care of myself when I'm ill without you, catering to my own needs without you, even if I need something urgently, you only care for your own needs, regardless how much effort I've put in to planning things for you and us, it doesn't work out. You claimed that you are really busy now, which caused you to have troubles in managing your work, studies, me & your family. As a result, you took my feelings for granted and expected me to understand you all the time. Well, if you think deeper, now that you are busy, in future, when you've graduated and get into real working life, won't you be even busier? And if I'm unable to feel the attention from you now, I won't be able to feel secure and happy for the future. I need someone who is able to provide me the same as I am doing for you too. You've your expectations of a wife, don't I have the right of having mine too?
I don't deny that money is an important factor for the future. But then again, what's the point of earning so hard, yet unable to provide each other attention? In that case, then I think it's better for you to be alone.
It hurts deeply for a 5 years relationship that didn't work out. However, I rather (us) to be hurt now than to regret the future.
Finally, I took the courage to remove the photo of ours and replaced a photo of myself with my bestfriend. I'll slowly learn to move on and live for myself.
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