Wednesday, September 05, 2007

` Headache ..

had nitemare in the middle of the nite again . my whole body cld not move . but this time , i was too tired to even think abt it . i just opened my eyes and daze for abt half hr or so , and i went back to slp again .

was feeling very giddy when i woke up at 7 plus . however , i told myself that i have to attend sch even though i wasnt feeling very well as i have doubts in my proj . stayed up till 2am to finish up f.o.o powerpoint last nite. got myself prepared and called my dad to check if he was nearby . unfortunately he wasnt . so i took bus 176 down to sch .

the moment i board the bus , my dad called me and asked me whr was i . so i told him . for no reason i got scolding from him ? saying that i was stupid becos i board the bus ?

in my heart i was like ...
"what the hell ? you asked me to go by myself and now you, scolded me stupid for taking the bus ? DAMN ! "

was rather pissed off in the bus . i teared . was feeling rather terrible becos i was damn tired and i got scolded for no reason .
rahhhhhs ~

i cld no longer bring myself to smile for the whole morning though i tried to . they were all fake . oh wells , i shld say the whole day in fact .

thank you frens for those who tried to cheer me up .
i smiled for you guys but it didnt last for long .
i'm sorry !

i broke down again when i was sharing my probs with jaslin and wenting in class during hospitality sales . i dunno why .. the moment i mention abt my dad or smth , i just felt so much like crying . was i really hurt by his words ? mayb i was just too exhausted thats why im feeling like this .

got back progress test results for PMS and Hospitality Sales . felt satisfied for my marks .
((:

went to jaslin's house after sch to finish up on our proj . we just left this wk to finish up . gotta chiong for everything already.
SIGH ~
there's simply too much thing to do .

many ppl were are stressed up too but they seemed going strong unlike me .
im just a weakling .
i thought i cld go strong like what others did .
never did i expect to break down just like that .

haish !

left her hse at 6 plus .. and .. dear dear waited for me to go home . then we went back together with nic , kel and aikho . just as i parted him at harbour front , my head hurts suddenly . was feelin giddy . luckily i was able to control till i got home .

didnt really have the appetite to eat . entered my room after dinner .
somehow, i dun really feel like socialising but just be alone for the moment .
hahs !
probably , i was too tired to even socialise .

his phobia occured to him again .
he had been thinking it again every now and then .
i blamed myself on 23rd july for entering the saloon after knowing what happen .
for this, i wld not forget .
i hurt him so ..
please do not say sorry anymore becos its totally not your fault .
it was me who started all these ...

gonna sleep early for todae .
my head hurts terribly !
dun worry ...
i promise i'll take good care of myself .

=) .

" It has happened .
When will it end ? "

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