we got teacher , lye shan hao to entertain us a little ..
alrights all those were just some mini entertainments .
((:
went to visit the chinese physician todae . did acupunture and it pains the hell outta me . it was ever the first time i teared in pain during acupunture . never in my life did i suffer so much . it wasnt my first time doing it but just that this time it really hurts !
he was viewing the med which the hosp doc gave me and he said those medication were all painkillers . it doesnt even help my nerves . what i hurt most was 2 points of my nerves . the 4th and 5th one . this fall was really serious . from now , i had to visit him twice a week to do acupunture before he cld really rub my leg to loosen up my nerves . becos if he were to really rub on my back . once he hurt it , thats it ! i would either be paralysed or another serious injury wld happen again .
oh god , BLESS ME !
the feeling of acupunture was like needle poking into my kneel . and he just shake the needle to loosen up my veins . it really hurts becos it just like you yourself getting electricuted.
thats how painful it was .
dad fetched me home..
got myself prepared and waited for my two marias , aikho and jaslin to come to my hse ... then , we took a cab down together to dear's house . nic and mich were there as well . was kinda pissed off with the cab driver's attitude . but seeing him was an old man , i didnt really bother much larhs .
anw , we had dinner and watched movie together . i was feeling rather exhausted becos i gave in all my strength during the acupunture . i cld barely smile . then i finally K.O on dear's shoulder . everything was doing fine till my dad came over to fetch me . he was feeling irritated just becos he cant find dear's home .
yeahs . i know its difficult but must you vent your anger on me ? what wrong have i done ? and must you say those unpleasant stuffs which really hurts me ? i told him i was there just becos i wan him to know so as not to worry too much . i compromise him so much and yet i get this kind of results ? isst fair to me ? no let me put it this way , are you being fair to me ?
after the incident i had last time , i have been trying my best to keep up a good relationship with him . do you know how hard issit to communicate with him ? just becos of one location he cant find , i just have to let him vent anger on me ? why cant he just understand how i felt ?
the reason of me joining my frens was because i just wanna be happy . its not that i am unhappy being with my relatives . i was surppose to go to my aunty house with my parents . it was a last min decision but i chose to be with my frens . why ? becos i wanna relax my mind after going through so much . do you know , its really hard for me to stay strong all this while and i really tried my best to do so . yet , i get tis kind of result !
the rest had to leave at 1130pm . it was late and they had to catch the last train . so i let them go off first . as a result i was left in house waiting for my parents . like that also got wrong mehs ? its not as if we did something dirty wad . you just have to be considerate .. if they waited for me , they had to take cab . then i ask you , dont you think its selfish . asking them to keep me company then in the end they had to take cab home ?
i know .. i know u are worried . i know you do care . but i just need your understanding . if u keep thinking this way then how am i surppose to communicate with you ? i wanted to argue back to you in the vehicle but mom told me not to do so .. in order not to make the situation worse and i dun wanna make things difficult for us as well . its really very exhausting . especially for me and my mom being caught in the middle .
i really hate this ! i really hate this phrase of yours ! it really hurts me from the bottom of my heart . i dun care whether u read this anot . i just wanna say out how much it actally hurts me . if u wanna control .. stopping me to see my frens. GO AHEAD ! then dun blame me from being even more rebellious !
TRY ME !
I WILL DO THAT !
I SWEAR THE HELL OUT OF THAT !
oh ~ and do you know something ? once i heard you are boiling ? i thought i cld cool you down a little by rushing up fast . i even gave up my clutches climbing up the steps despite how much pain am i having . so that i cld reach faster .
my leg really hurts so much now ... im willing to risk my leg regardless how much pain am i having but in the end , i got so much hurt becos of the words you gave me . so this is what i get as a result .
THANK YOU SO MUCH !
i thought after being discharged from hosp everything wld be back to as normal but never did i thought , problems come after another . tell me , how much more do i have to go through ? im really , truely , freaking exhausted from all these stuffs !
when will i ever lead a normal , peaceful life ?
" Trust is what i need from you ..
Is it so hard to achieve ? "
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