` What is going on ?

i have been browsing through my fren's blog . especially my close one or even my best fren . what has been happening when i was away ? why isst when i read it ? things have changed so much ?

what is happening to jessica , my marmie ?
what is happening to junping , my sweetie pie ?
what is happening to jia en , my darling ?

etc etc ..

im not afraid to mention names because i do care for them but what breaks me was .. why are they feeling this way ?

its not that i have neglected them . its not that i have left them all alone . its not that i dun wanna meet them . but the problem is that , so many things have been happening to me . i dun even have time to enjoy myself these days . you know ? its simply hard for me to carrying on though i have been trying so hard to .

i just wanna tell you guys that . please do not break friendships . i dunno whats going on but its really heartbreaking to see all of you like this . i apologise for not being there by you girls side . i know everyone has its own point of view but isnt there this say , forgive and forget ?

think , you girls have been each other for years . you spent good times and bad times together . are u girls willing to give up just like that ? i dunno . i really dunno how you girls think . but if you girls think that this is going to be the way . if this really makes your life easier then so be it . i have nth to say . i respect you girls decisions .

whatever it turns out to be , im always here for you girls . i may not be the best adviser , i may not be there in person but rest assure .. a listening ear is always available for you girls . im really saying this from the bottom of my heart and i really mean it . you girls will never face it alone . i promise i will face it with you all as well .

please stay strong . i dun wanna lose friendships neither do i wanna see breaking up of friendships just like that . it really breaks the hell out of me !

just remember ,
I LOVE YOU GIRLS LOADS !
and i really treasure our friendships we had .

anyway , jaslin , dear , nic and aikho came to my hse todae to visit me . we had some fun and jaslin was the chef . will post the video soon when its uploaded . =) . they left around 1130pm .

to passerby who tagged my blog . i dunno who u are and i dun care who u are . i do admit that i have left out mentioning my mom in my blog though its just the word, " family " . though i may not have written it . but you do not know how much i thank her during all these while during my stay in the hosp . i may have written so many thanks to my frens in my blog but all these cant compare how much thanks is to my mom .

she is the best mom i have ever had in my whole life .
words will never be enough to describe how much i love and treasure her .

gonna go to chinses physican tml .
wish me luck on my pain becos its gonna hurt real bad .
=(

" I dunno how much more pain am i going through ,
But I'm just gonna hang on right till the end of time . "